"My name is D-Booth and I'm an addict"

This is where you would say: "Hi D-Booth"

Yeah, so I have a problem... one of many, you might say. Anyway, I figured who better to come clean with than my nonexistent cyber pals.

One problem with trying to conceive a mini-me at this point in my life is that I'm OLD - at least in baby-making years. I'm 37 and a half (when did we become too old to use the half?!) and I've had a job for more than half of my life. Long story short, that means that I've been able to buy most of the [less expensive] things that I've wanted. Not having kids has afforded me the opportunity to splurge on myself every now and then. If/when Baby B comes along, I realize that will have to change... yet another thing that I'm not really sure that I'm ready to handle.

Shopping is my vice - especially a good sale - that's my thing. I LOVE finding an awesome sale and then being like, "I just got this awesome shirt on sale for $4.97 - isn't it cute?!" (that actually just happened to me last week). love, Love, LOVE to shop! But for the greater good - and in preparation of Baby B - I've decided to quit cold turkey... for ONE month, that is. We'll see how things go and make a judgement call from there.

So let the record show that during the month of August I will not buy:

• Clothes (up to and including underwear)
• Shoes
• Hats
• Jewelry
• Purses
• Perfumes
• New technologies (including any electronics and Wii games)

This will NOT include:

• Gifts for others
• Groceries
• Groupons and/or LivingSocial deals... or items gotten as a result of previously purchased Groupons/LivingSocial deals
• Items ruled an absolute necessity
• Books

This may not seem like that big of a feat, but if I were to post a picture of my stack of receipts from the last month, you would see just how serious this is. I mean, I'm no Rebecca Bloomwood (come on - read a book already), but cutting back wouldn't be the worse thing.

Well, wish me luck. In an effort to keep myself honest, I'll be posting my successes - and failures - regularly. Gotta run, only 9 more shopping days 'til this thing takes affect!

** Note: You can follow my efforts to curb my love of shopping by clicking on the page entitled "Operation 'Stop Shop!'" right below the blog title **

Month 7, Cycle Day 14...

Month 7, Cycle Day 14... if you're thinking to yourself "hey, shouldn't you be having sex instead of writing this entry," I've got 8 words for you:

"Who do you think you are, my pimp?!"

I'm just sayin'. More specifically, if you're on your grind in terms of cycle days then maybe you too have been TTC recently. BTW, hope things have worked out in your favor - clearly they haven't for me yet.

As it turns out, my sex organs are tied to my brain. UGGGHH - I hate being your stereotypical girl - tangling sex all up with emotion, but alas this is where we are. If hubby's being a douche -- for the record, I'm not saying he is... 'course, I'm not saying he's not either -- but IF he was being a total twerp then it might stand to reason that I don't feel like spreading the drumsticks, right? That's what makes this whole conception business hard. My eggs are numbered - can I afford to waste one on my bad attitude?

Let's hope that baby Brandon forgives me...

Today's Life Lesson

I had planned to continue blogging about my baby-making woes... but in true DBooth-fashion, my frustration has shifted and in holding with my "Live YOUR truth" motto, I have to take this time to vent...

I've always seen my role in my family as the peace-maker -- the one who tries to right all the wrongs and make everyone happy. Admittedly, this has always been a pretty hard job, but I felt that it was one that I was fairly good at... until about a year ago when I mailed a letter that threw everything out of whack. As a result, I have been trying to tread lightly to avoid making matters worse ever since.

Granted, I'll be the first to say that I'm overly-sensitive. If someone I care about gets their feelings hurt, my feelings get hurt too... on their behalf. Slightly crazy, I know. But it's that sensitivity that makes me who I am, so I'm not going to apologize for it... living my truth and all that.

So now that I feel like matters have gotten out of hand, I don't know what to do. Experience has taught me to mind my own business and let these things work themselves out... but what if they don't? AARGH! I have so many other things going on that I can stress myself out about, so I'm channeling this particular frustration into today's entry.

Those of you who really know me know that I lost my grandfather last year and that I had SO much guilt about the things that I hadn't said to him and about having not seen or talked to him that often since my wedding in '08. I wouldn't wish that feeling on anyone. Fortunately there was never any animosity or hurt feelings between my Paw-Paw and me, BUT if I felt that guilty and there wasn't an outstanding issue, I can only imagine how I would feel if something happened to someone I cared about that I was mid-spat with.

Long story short, I want to remind everyone that tomorrow's not promised to any of us. If you're angry at a spouse, a loved one, a parent, a sibling, a friend, a child, a neighbor, whoever - drink some prune juice and let that Sugar-Honey-Ice-Tea go. If a discussion is required - have it.. and then be done with it. Life's simply too short for such silliness.